This would happen even if it was just text is a csv file and having nothing to do with numbers. It was jarring, then really annoying, and finally led to extra work of formatting something visually pleasing and printing it out for him. He objectively should have overcome his quirks and look past a grid. But at the end of the day, I wanted his advice or sign off on something, so I had to meet him where he was.

The product profession preaches talking to users for the same reason, people don’t behave how you expect them to. The further away you get from an actual person using the product, the more problems you will likely have. But that isn’t just true for your users. That absurd overreaction taught me something that I have seen on every team since, that you can’t approach stakeholder management in a one-size fits all way.

On any team, you may all have the same belief in your mission and in general a similar drive. But the difference between someone going that extra mile or feeling encouraged for a job well done can still remain. The specific things that gets me excited a the progress we are making (a mixpanel funnel or improved trial conversion rate) is not the same as anyone else on my team. One person loves positive user feedback that they are less overwhelmed after using the product. When I am talking to her, I make sure to surface that to complement the mixpanel funnel. We had an engineer who liked seeing people use the product so I would flag logrocket videos that were worth her time. My goal is the same, to keep people aligned and motivated but you have to meet people where they are to be effective.

What should you do?
• Broaden who you consider a stakeholder. It is not just your boss or a board member; it should also include anyone who is working on the project, selling it, or will be providing customer support
• Introspection is your friend. Every time you see something that really motivates you, convinces you one way or another, or just bums you out, write it down. After 2 weeks, start categorizing it and see what patterns emerge. I find data that I can get my hands on and analyze in several different ways really compelling, as well as clear cut success and failures. I would much rather see a product initiative backfire than make no difference at all because I can learn from it and make adjustments
• Ask people what they care about. Grab coffee with your 5 most important stakeholders and ask them what makes them tick. That may not tell the full story, and sometimes there’s a disconnect between what they say and what actually impacts them, but it is an important starting point
• Occasionally ask for someone to play devil’s advocate. Doing this all of the time will be annoying for everyone. However, if you said that you have seen this very compelling case for x, y, z reasons and ask someone why you might be wrong, you will get a good idea of the things that are convincing to them